Hair Shamed No More: I’m Determined To Become Mandy With The Good Hair

This was the last time I liked my hair. Also the last time I had a decent battery charge.

This was the last time I liked my hair. Also the last time I had a decent battery charge.

Hi, my name is Amanda and I have bad hair, but maybe I don’t have to. Perhaps I’ve been using the wrong products or I’m not trying hard enough. I can’t determine just one cause of my bad hair—I mean I can name a few, but I am determined to do what it takes to fix this problem.

Now, I know you’re thinking that my hair isn’t that bad.  Sure, worse hair most certainly exists. But that doesn’t change how I feel about myself. I realize I devote too much energy to feeling self-conscious about my hair. It isn’t serving me. I’m driving myself (and possibly my husband) completely crazy.

Naturally, my hair is kind of like Carrie Bradshaw’s but dry and overly processed (read: bleach blonde) with the bonus of split ends. It also breaks more easily than a five-year-old playing with her mom’s Baccarat Butterfly collection.

I had extensions for a year and took them out a while ago. The plan was to was to air dry my hair and extensions. I had gorgeous mermaid hair for a while. But a year of extensions was still damaging. And no matter how amazing your extensions look, a little wind or even a slight of the hand can cause the tape, a bead or weft (yes, I had all three kinds) to show. Unless you have a glamsquad 24 hours a day (hello Erika Jayne), extensions never look perfect. They’re also annoying if you workout. I thought extensions were the solution to my problem, but they weren’t. So, I decided to let it bleed and be extension free for over six months now. At first it wasn’t bad, but now my hair is just awful. It also turns out I’m not the only one who sees my hair this way.

I had a recent experience that brought me to my breaking point. I described what happened in detail on my podcast with Abby Stern. I was at Beautycon and both my intern and Ali had left. My feet were tired from standing for hours in Manolo Blahniks, but I was still rallying. As I walked around, I encountered a woman who I will call Washed Up Bitch, or WUB for short. She asked me if I wanted to sit and try her hair extensions. All I heard was sit.

As we made small talk, WUB kept telling me how pretty I was, much like a Disney villain about to poison me. She put the halo extensions in my hair and complimented me in the most backhanded way I’ve ever heard in my life. She said that everything about me was beautiful and sexy, but my hair was bad. Those are words I hear enough from myself. I didn’t need to hear them from WUB. Although she offered me $1000 off (and asked if I could be a before and after picture for her website) she did not sell me a hairpiece that day. But WUB did sell me her opinions. They’ve been occupying my mind ever since.

Then earlier this week, I was on Kate Casey’s podcast talking about Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making The Team on CMT. I was criticizing one of the judges for not looking perfect on the show because she has what appears to be acne scars on her face. Acne scars are an unfortunate problem that many people suffer from. But it shouldn’t be a problem for a woman who not only has the means and resources to get rid of them, but is also on television. I’m sure a local doctor could fix this issue in exchange for an Instagram post or a Tweet. So why isn’t she doing everything she can? And then I realized for so many reasons that I sounded like a total hypocrite. Because I haven’t done everything I can to fix my beauty problem. And now, I am going to do it. I’m going balls to the wall to get good hair. If I have to eat it, apply it or inject it, I’ve decided I’m going to do everything I can to get good hair without extensions.

So, what’s the plan? It’s going to take a village of products. I’ll let you what they are next week…

EDIT: So I've had some feedback about this post. Look, I know it's not easy to get rid of acne scars, but this woman's job is to judge other people on their looks. Also, I know I can be a very critical person both of myself and others.